Selfishness produces a void which is why the things used to fill it are reached for again and again. We all have an addict in us as the consequences of the things used result in the same bondage.
There’s only one person who you have to be true to and that is yourself. You may do some things that nobody sees you doing, but you’re not fooling anyone because you know what you’re doing. You don’t get away with anything that you do in life. You may be ignorant why certain things are done, but that doesn’t lessen the consequences. There are consequences for every action, but it’s not because there’s a God watching you. You yourself are the cause of your consequences and they will be determined by the base of what your actions are; either love or selfishness.
The actions to fulfill inner desires are pursued forever because their results sustain the void that creates the desire. Alcohol, cigarettes, porn, gambling, drugs, food, sex, sports, our children, to name of few, are all used to fulfill some selfish inner desire and therefore will need to be used over and over. This is because all things are empty in nature. This is also why the things used don’t matter because whatever and whenever something is used to fulfill a selfish desire, it sustains a void that’s already in place. The void remains because the nature of anything reached for from a selfish void is empty and reaching behavior is based in emptiness. It’s the cause of so much suffering to ourselves and others.
We label certain people as addicts, but aren’t we all using certain things for fulfillment. Completeness is in the present moment, so anytime something is reached for to fulfill an inner desire out of the present moment it’s created by an inner lack; a selfish desire uses whatever it can, to fulfill this lack. A person’s conditioning decides what the thing used is, but regardless of what it is the selfish nature is no different. It’s just that some things are not as devastating in their consequences as others. Some results of the consequences are instantaneous and some take time to develop, but the effects of the energy of the reaching is always the same; selfishness breeds selfishness. So do what it is that you want to do, but understand you cannot hide from yourself. Although your Conditioned Mind will make you believe that you can, you cannot truly lie to yourself because wherever you go there you are. You may use justification as to why you are doing something, but there will always be consequences for you actions. Whether those actions are from love or are selfish in nature is the determining factor as to whether you will live a life that is always reaching for the next satisfaction or if you are complete just the way you are.