Understanding conditioned behavior for what it is doesn’t condone unloving behavior nor does it exalt loving behavior, it just allows one to see that a person can only act as the conditioning in place allows.
It’s pivotal to one’s peace of mind to not judge the conditioned behavior of not only individuals, but also of oneself. If one is to ever be at peace there can’t be judgement of how someone behaves. This instantly causes separation because it puts up a barrier between the one who’s judged and the one who is doing the judging. Judging emanates an energy that makes a me and a you, without this judging energy one is in unity with themselves and with others. I know this isn’t easy to accept, but people can only do what their conditioning tells them to do and although the consequences of one’s behavior will be drastically different, judging anyone causes separation from oneself and thus from all humanity; non judgmental unites, judging separates.
Seeing the conditioning for what it is doesn’t condone unloving behavior nor does it exalt loving behavior, it just allows one the understanding that everyone does what they’re conditioned to do. In this understanding there is a peace that passes all understanding and it’s because there’s no judging energy to cause separation. There can’t be because in this space of not judging and just seeing the conditioning for what it is, it’s not being assigned to anyone in particular, it’s just being seen as the conditioning in place and regardless if there’s loving or unloving behavior, it’s just conditioning, nothing more, nothing less.