A heart of love doesn’t suffer, it aches. Primary emotions are the main emotions that arise and they’re far different than when there’s attachment that allows secondary emotions to arise.
This is the biggest misunderstanding when it comes to emotions. Emotions will arise, that’s a given they are a part of being human, but what happens after the primary emotions arise determines the degree of the suffering one endures. At first the emotions are primary and this is what needs to be focused on if one is to ever experience liberation from the suffering emotions can cause. Secondary emotions arise when one attaches to the primary emotions and this is directly linked to the level of suffering that’s experienced. Emotions don’t cause suffering, attachment to them does. An example of attachment to emotions would be if someone accidentally cut you off on the highway, at first you are scared, but right after that you become angry and chase them. Another example is if you go to the doctor and they find something wrong, you can project having one foot in the box (dying) or you can wait and see what the test results are. Add your own example.
Attaching to emotions is how stories are made up, but they don’t add anything to life. They just create stories which feeds the energy that causes suffering. You can only be the energy that encompasses you and when there’s suffering it’s because of the energy that’s be projected. This is what determines the degree of one’s emotional suffering. A heart of love doesn’t suffer, it aches, losing a loved one doesn’t necessarily have to cause suffering. It will though if there’s attachment to the secondary emotion which always wants the situation different than what it is. Hence here is where suffering arises from because when there’s attachment to emotions, the energy that’s in place can only cause suffering because it’s what’s being held.