When one is under the control of the Conditioned Mind they behave in ways not because it’s the way that one wants to be, but because it’s the way one has to be.
It was a lack of understanding of what I was truly up against that caused me to remain entrapped to it, and what I was entrapped to was my own mind that was conditioned to self serve. The problem with this type of conditioning is it causes one’s own destruction because the destructiveness is disguised as pleasure. This pleasure is pursued by many to their death. It was pursued by me in this way and I was at it’s mercy. It said to me to use drugs, alcohol, gambling, womanizing, lying, cheating, stealing and so on. This is how the Conditioned Mind is developed except for some who are fortunate enough to see this at a young age.
The way I was conditioned wasn’t the fault of anyone in particular, it happened indirectly by the inner and outer influences of my life which molded me to behave in the ways my conditioning dictated. Not because this is how I wanted to be, but by not understanding this, it was the way I had to be. You cannot behave in any other way except in the way you have been conditioned. Change the conditioning and change your entire existence or not and remain the same. The value of knowing my own mind is in the understanding there was no where else to turn; not to God, support groups, therapy, self help books, positive thinking, and so on. What I learned is when the Conditioned Mind is understood, the world is no longer in control. What I learned was it’s control slowly dissipates as one develops discipline, the mind actually slows down. Once this slowing occurs, the possibilities are endless because there are no longer the distractions that keeps one entrapped to the conditioning. With this solid understanding of what one is truly up against, you are able to develop the discipline so the conditioning eventually falls away.